Janitor? More Like Wrecker

[Vanellope]

(ooc: actually, Ralph, I had Vanellope *already* be on the top rung of the ladder; just for future reference.)

"Yup." Vanellope didn't figure she really had to be fair; but as far as she was concerned, she was perfectly within her rights to have taken over the top of the ladder for herself. Besides which, it meant that Ralph couldn't pack it up and move on to get away from her, not without tipping her off completely. She supposed she should have been worried that he'd just snatch the ladder from beneath her and let her fall; but the prospect wasn't one that really worried Vanellope. She was practically used to dropping long distances anyway, after all her candy-tree-climbing escapades, and the top of the ladder couldn't have been all that far from the ground in comparison. Even if worst came to the worst, she could manage that okay.

When he started making fun of her own appearance, Vanellope smirked to herself, not at all bothered. This was turning into a no-holds-barred insult contest, and she was only too happy to participate. Settling down on her chosen rung again, Vanellope fondled one of the small pieces of candy momentarily. "Yeah, well, at least mine doesn't all stick up like that." the girl stuck a hand beneath her fringe, shoving the hair up in a mocking way that only vaguely resembled Ralph's spikes. Hers might have candy in it - though Vanellope was actually quite fond of that, all told - but at least it didn't look like she'd simply raked her hair back with her hands and just left it like that.

"Hey, you ever hear what a hairbrush is? Because you sure look like you could use one!" She let her fringe drop back into place and resumed swinging her legs as they hung off the rung on which she perched.

[Deleted]

(ooc: Whoooops~ xD My bad.)

"Ha, ha, very funny," Ralph said. He knew perfectly well what a hairbrush was, but he'd never been able to find one in the dump. Even if he had, he probably wouldn't have used it. It probably wouldn't have helped his hair that much in the long run. Now that he had a better look at Vanellope, though, he realized just how short she actually was. Sure a lot of people were short compared to him, but somehow Vanellope just seemed particularly so. If this was turning into a full on war of the insults, he might as well poke fun at her height. Of course, Ralph realized that this could be used against him as well. How many people in the world were nine feet tall, anyway?

"So, you must be liking it up there. I mean, I thought the other people in my game were short. Then I saw you," Ralph remarked. It wasn't the best insult, granted, but he thought it would do for the time being. Now he just had to wait for Vanellope to retaliate with what he knew would likely be coming. Some kind of remark about how tall he was, no doubt.

[Vanellope]

"Yup, I am." Vanellope's legs kept swinging as she took the insult completely unfazed. It wasn't even that good an insult, in her opinion. After all, she was still a kid - that fact that she would always be a kid was completely immaterial - so being short was to be expected.

"Has to be better than bashin' my head on the celing whenever I enter a room," she jeered back, raising a hand to tug her collar again - and then just deciding, screw what the teachers said, she wasn't going to continue to endure this. She quickly worked her topmost button undone and edged her tie a tiny bit lower, even as she kept up speaking.

"An', I mean, don'cha get stuck in doorways? I've seen karts that weren't as wide as your shoulders." She gave a slight sigh of relief as the pressure on her throat eased, and leant back again, with just one hand behind her to support her on the rung, already feeling more comfortable.


(ooc: whoops, short post, sorry ^^; )

[Deleted]

She was right; his insult had been lousy. That didn't deter Ralph from trying again, though. Her own remarks about his massive size were to be expected. After all, he was one of the taller characters in any given game. He'd come to expect that others would notice. If they didn't... Well, he supposed if someone didn't notice it was either because they didn't care or they were more concerned with him being a bad guy.

...Wait a minute. That whole time he and Vanellope had been conversing as if it was completely normal. Did she not know that he was a bad guy? And if she did, did she even really care? Maybe it wasn't that big of a deal to a kid from Sugar Rush. Vanellope could have been one of those rare characters who just didn't have problems with bad guys in general, though. This revelation threw Ralph for a bit of a loop; he'd never really encountered anyone that actually didn't seem bothered by his existence. Yet, there it was happening right in front of him. Vanellope had yet to react badly to him. All she'd been doing was insulting him.

"Better than being a shrimp, I guess. Can't be much fun looking up at everybody when you talk to 'em. ...Or having to steal people's ladders to even get on the same height level. Is this a first time offense, or do you often take over people's ladders when they're trying to work?" Ralph asked. It had started as an insult, but then it just kind of stopped. Ralph didn't know why that was. Something about this girl just kind of intrigued him for one reason or another. He would have thought that someone her age would be with friends rather than busily bugging the janitor. Not that he necessarily had a problem with it beyond the obvious annoyance, but it still remained head scratching to him. Surely Vanellope had other friends to be hanging out with.

[Vanellope]

In all fairness, Vanellope wasn't *that* shrimpy when it came to the rest of the inhabitants of Sugar Rush. Sure, she might have stood a bit shorter than King Candy, or really any of the other kids, but there wasn't that much more than a couple of inches between her and, say, Taffyta. And even outside of Sugar Rush, well... Vanellope was almost glad of being short, if only in that it at least made it easier for her and Angel to talk to each other.

There wasn't much point in attempting a rational argument in the middle of hurling fun insults at one another, however, so Vanellope didn't make any point of trying to justify herself. "Well, someone as tall as you might give me a crick in the neck to look up at, but usually I'm fine," she shot back. Her expression turned a little quizzical as Ralph enquired whether this was her first time taking over someone's ladder; it almost sounded as though he was becoming genuinely interested. Almost. Vanellope wasn't sure; she was probably just imagining it, the girl figured. Even if the big wrecker didn't know she was a glitch, there was no real reason for him to be curious about her.

"Usually I'd be up the candy trees, but no-one imported any of 'em." Her tie dangled between her knees as the girl leant forward to better look down at Ralph, pondering whether to keep on bugging him or to actually return his seeming interest in her. It wasn't like she had anything to lose by being a little curious; but on the other hand, keeping on winding him up was just too much fun to simply give it up.

"So somethin' tells me this isn't your usual kinda work, huh?" A rather pointed look was given to the glass splinters down on the floor - all that remained of the bulbs from his previous two attempts at changing the light above her head - as she smirked again. Even if she wasn't going to directly taunt Ralph for right now, Vanellope still had no intention of making life easy for him.

[Deleted]

Candy trees? Didn't this girl have anything better to do than climb things? Well, at least it confirmed his previous suspicion of what game she'd come from. He would have liked to know what a kid from there was even doing here, though. Apart from the obvious, Ralph couldn't think of much that might have enticed a girl to come from what much have been a sugary paradise (at least to her) to a school like this. Rather than asking, though, Ralph let Vanellope ask her own question. She'd hit the nail on the head, so to speak. This janitor business wasn't his usual line of work.

"Well, you're right about that much kid," Ralph answered. "What I usually do is right there in my name. I wreck things. Why the heck they thought I'd make a good janitor is beyond me."

This only further raised the question of what Vanellope was even doing hanging out with him. Surely she could have figured out that he could have been a bad guy at any given point. But... Maybe because she was from a game world where bad things didn't happen, she thought that he was just a big, stinky, guy that broke things. Ralph really didn't know for sure. He wasn't about to directly ask, either. The last thing he wanted was for Vanellope to freak out if she realized he was meant to be a villain.

[Vanellope]

"Yup, figured as much from the broken bulbs. How many more of 'em d'you reckon you're gonna smash?"

Nope, she hadn't let up jeering Ralph, not by a long shot. More, Vanellope was just exploring different ways to go about the process of bugging the big wrecker. Somehow, she didn't seem to be as effectively pushing his buttons now; it was almost as if he'd got used to her, and Vanellope figured she probably ought to change that. After all, there was no way he'd care to spend any more time in her vicinity once he realised she was just a glitch - people here might not mind it, but another game character would know exactly what she was as soon as her body gave her away - so Vanellope intended to make the most of him not reviling her yet by continuing to bug him. No point opening up to someone who was just going to shove her away eventually.

She could have offered to help Ralph with the lightbulb, of course. Her hands were much more delicate than his own, and if he lifted her up higher, she'd be able to reach the fitting, easy. It wasn't as if Vanellope was unaware of this fact; she just didn't have any particular plans to make the offer while watching Ralph struggle was amusing her. Or would be, as soon as he got back to it.

"So besides breaking bulbs, what other work they got you doing here?" The question may have sounded innocent enough as Vanellope asked it, but it certainly promised further mockery dependant on his answer. The girl started to roll back onto her belly, found out the rung wasn't really wide enough and instead drapped herself over it, arms hanging over one side while her legs dangled off the other. She took a moment to liberate her tie where the end of it had got caught beneath her, so it instead hung down between her arms, then looked expectantly back at Ralph.

[Deleted]

"Depends on if I can actually get up there and try to get 'em in," Ralph answered. He didn't try to hide the irritation this time. The fact that Vanellope was pointing out that yes, he was making a mess of trying to fix one lightbulb, did get under his skin a bit. Thankfully, Vanellope had decided to ask about just what else it was that Ralph did around the school. It wasn't any more humiliating than continuing to point out that he was a failure of a janitor, but he still did have to realize that she had a good question to ask. It had to be something that many people must have wondered.

"Well, let's see... I'm supposed to fix things that get broken around here, clean the school, lock up at night... Boring stuff like that. Go ahead and laugh, kid. I know it must sound completely insane... A wrecker like me actually trying to fix things," Ralph said. It was a good point, though. Who on earth thought a wrecker, a bad guy like him, was any good at fixing anything? Someone crazy, that was for sure. Ralph didn't want to actually admit to that much, though. Vanellope had to have figured that much out on her own by that point. Whoever was in charge of the school had to be some kind of weird, crazy person for putting people they had in charge of classes and janitorial duties. Not that it really mattered. The person in charge had given him a job that saved him from the scorn of the Nicelanders. That much had to count for something, didn't it?

[Vanellope]

Ohhhhh yeah, she was in his way, wasn't she? Still, Vanellope was enjoying her vantage point up here and wasn't really ready to give it up just yet; even if watching Ralph go back to struggling with the lightbulb was sure to be a source of amusement in its own right once she let him. Still, the girl managed a fairly innocent face as she hung where she was, listening to Ralph explain his other duties. Or maybe 'doodies' was more appropriate, given the mess she was sure he had to make of each of them. Vanellope gave a little snigger at the thought.

"Wow, they really didn't think that one though. Whaddya do, break the things more? Are all the locks still intact, of have ya damaged them yet too?" Vanellope rocked back and forth in her current position, unashamedly laughing at the idea of Ralph trying to do any of the things he'd mentioned. Or at least, of trying to do them successfully. And as for the cleaning... what did he do, pick up the garbage and compact it all with his bare hands? They were sure big enough for that, at least. And it would explain his stink, too.

"An' you tryin'ta use a mop, that's somethin' I'd pay money to see." She chortled at the very idea. That was, if she'd had any to pay in the first place; but Ralph didn't need to know that. After a moment, Vanellope's laughter died down a little, and she tilted her head, curious to see the big man's reaction to her jeering.

[Deleted]

"Funny. Real funny, kid," Ralph said. He had said she could laugh at him, granted, but he hadn't quite expected a full rundown of just how ill-equipped he was for the job. But she did have a point. All of the things he'd listed off would have been much better jobs for Felix than him. But Felix was nowhere to be found, at least for the present moment, so Ralph was left to do all these things himself. Still, his expression gave no way to the idea that he actually was amused himself. Truth be told, Ralph was already fed up with having to work as a janitor. It was no better than him working as a wrecker, but at least here he got paid. It wasn't a grand amount of money, granted, but at least it was better than nothing at all.

"No, nothing's broken... Yet. Except that stupid lightbulb that stopped working. But as you can see, it's not going so well. Replacing it, I mean," Ralph said. He didn't really want to go much further with that discussion, but he would if he had to.

"And I suppose the things you do around here are so much better? I'd have thought that a kid like you would have better things to do than hang out with a guy like me," he finally said. He hadn't necessarily wanted to voice his thoughts on that much, but they'd finally come out. Maybe now Ralph would get some insight as to why Vanellope was bothering to hang out with him in the first place. He couldn't imagine that she was doing it just out of boredom between classes. Maybe there was another reason behind this. Ralph didn't really expect Vanellope to give him a straightforward answer, though. That would be asking for far too much, he was certain.

[Vanellope]

"Yeah, I noticed," Vanellope leant further forward, a smirk dancing on her face... a smirk that lasted for as long as it took for Ralph to turn the conversation back to her. As he did, however, the expression dwindled from one of amusement to genuine puzzlement. Possibly he only wanted to know where she should be so he could more effectively shoo her off to wherever that place was, but he actually sounded... almost sincere?

Since when did anyone want to know anything about her with any sincerity at all? Well, with the obvious exception of Angel; but Vanellope counted her friend as in a different league to everyone else entirely.

"Oh, you know, I got time between classes. An' besides, watchin' you screw up is funny." And with Angel elsewhere - Vanellope thought the canine had said something about having a class of her own at present - there wasn't anyone else who'd want to hang out with someone like her. Not that the little glitch really had any intention of telling Ralph that aside from one dog, she was all alone in the world. The wrecker wasn't so dumb that he wouldn't find anything odd with that; and then it would only be a matter of time before he put two and two together and got 'glitch'. And that wasn't something she was in any hurry to have occur.

But if she was here to enjoy watching Ralph screw up, Vanellope supposed, she'd better let him get on with it. Quick as a flash, the little girl vanished from the ladder rung; and the next thing the janitor would know, she was lying on her front on one of his giant shoulder, propping herself up on her elbows. As long as she was here for the show, after all, Vanellope figured she may as well get the best vantage point.

"Sooo, ya gonna keep on at it?" she prompted as she proceeded to make herself comnfortable.

[Deleted]

"What the...?"

How had Vanellope done that? One minute she'd been hanging there, and the next thing Ralph knew Vanellope was perched up on his shoulder. He might have objected to it at any other point, but the fact that someone like Vanellope wanted to be anywhere near him was kind of... Surreal. No one ever wanted to be that close to the wrecker, let alone touch him. Most people were too afraid of him because he was a bad guy to want to get close to him. They thought he'd hurt them or was just all around a bad person. Not Vanellope, apparently. Apparently her amusement of his trying to fix the lightbulb problem overrode any desire to be afraid of him. In fact, in that whole time that they'd been conversing, Vanellope really hadn't displayed any signs of fear around Ralph. There was the fact that he'd tried to grab her, granted, but apart from that... Maybe she really wasn't afraid of him.

"...Yeah. I'm gonna get back to it. And you can stay there, but you gotta make sure you're not gonna just fall over or something," Ralph said. Finally, it seemed the universe had decided to cooperate with him. He could get back to work. With the assumption that Vanellope was going to keep herself balanced and not fall over, Ralph started to make his way up the ladder again.

"To be honest, I didn't think you'd want to be anywhere near this close to me. I thought I was just a big, stinky wrecker," he laughed. Ralph wasn't sure why he was amused by this thought, but he kind of was. He'd have thought that kids in particular would be afraid of him. Not Vanellope, though. Strange... It was almost as though the two were similar or something. He didn't know anything about her supposed condition, though, so it was just a vague assumption on his part rather than something he'd say out loud.

[Vanellope]

Lying on her belly as she was, Vanellope figured she was in no danger of falling off. Even if Ralph was to move suddenly, she could easily grab a handful of his shirt to steady herself, so the little glitch saw herself as perfectly safe; and though she was jogged a little as the wrecker started up the ladder once again, she remained stable enough not to be convinced otherwise. The girl wiggled her feet where they stuck out into the air behind her, and prepared to be amused just as soon as Ralph went for the bulb again.

After all, she doubted the phrase 'third time lucky' was going to be one that applied in the big man's case.

"You are big an' stinky. But you're funny, too." It probably wasn't what Ralph had wanted to hear; Vanellope wasn't really bothered by that much, however. She wasn't here with any specific intention to make him happy, after all; the glitched girl was one who would say what she wanted to say, and not really care all that much about the reactions it invited.

"Where'd they grow people with freakish hands like yours, anyway?" she enquired after a few moments of continuing to simply observe him. Not that it mattered all that much to her where she was from; she knew very little about the arcade beyond Sugar Rush anyway, never having been allowed to leave. She had a vague idea of what might have been out there, in the form of game names and rough ideas of what was what, from bits and pieces she'd overheard, but otherwise knew very little. Still, she wanted to know where freakishly big hands were the norm.

[Deleted]

He could easily have gotten angry, but he decided to instead let the 'funny' remark slide. No one had ever told him he was funny before, so Ralph was keen to accept it. Besides... He probably would have laughed, too, if he'd been watching himself try to fix the burnt out lightbulb like Vanellope had. Ralph instead grunted after hearing the remark and continued up the ladder. Once he was as high as he could go, he pulled out the lightbulb once more and reached out to try and get it in place. That was when Vanellope asked her next question. Ralph somehow managed to keep the bulb in his grasp, this time without breaking it, and managed to concentrate on answering the query while he worked.

"If you mean what game am I from, it's Fix-it Felix Junior," Ralph said. "I'm the only guy with hands like these, though. Everyone else is more or less your size. Comes with being the b... Wrecker, I guess."

He'd almost slipped and said bad guy. Inwardly, Ralph kicked himself for that near slip-up. If he'd let it slip now that he was a bad guy, then surely Vanellope would no longer want anything to do with him. Not that Ralph imagined that Vanellope wanted all that much to do with him in the first place, but still... She wasn't exactly a friend, but the only person who'd bothered to really talk to him the whole time he'd been there. Might as well try to keep that much more or less the same while he could. The last thing he wanted was for her to discover what he really was and decide she no longer liked him because of it.

"I don't have to guess where you're from, though. That candy-coated go-kart game by the whack-a-mole, right?" he asked. This time, it seemed he was doing a decent enough job of screwing in the lightbulb. There hadn't been any disasters... Yet.

[Vanellope]

Fix-it Felix Junior? Wasn't that the one she could juuuuuust see through the screen on the incredibly rare occasions she got a glimpse through it? If she'd ever got up onto the racer selection screen - or the winners' podium - Vanellope was sure she'd have known for certain; there was a very clear view out across the arcade from either of them. As it was, however... well, like her ever ending up on either of them was ever gonna happen. As much as her half-completed Lickety Split back home was her effort to change that, Vanellope had pretty much come to just accept it by now. Especially now that she had a friend in Angel so her life wasn't completely void of any real meaning.

She didn't even blink at Ralph's almost slip of the tongue; even if he had gone ahead and said 'bad guy', Vanellope would have been unlikely to be at all fazed. Her game didn't really have 'good guys' and 'bad guys' in the traditional sense, anyway, so they weren't labels that meant much to the little girl. If anything, she was the bad guy, at least in the other racers' eyes, simply for being what she was.

"Sugar Rush, yup." She didn't, however, seem inclined to elaborate. Rather, Vanellope watched, now that Ralph had started to work at the bulb, with fascination; less for the process itself and more so that she didn't miss Ralph's next screw-up. It was inevitable that was going to happen at some point, anyway - his hands were nowhere near delicate enough for the task - and Vanellope was fully prepared to burst out laughing again just as soon as that happened. And besides, it gave her an excuse not to say much more about her home that might tell Ralph exactly what she was.

"So how're ya going to break it this time?" she abruptly chimed in, just as the big wrecker was reaching the most delicate part of the operation.