You Had One Job

[Nill]

((Sept 9th.  Open to all non-teaching staff.  _{i can't name threads}))


If there was one single, solitary good thing about the academy, it was that they sold booze.  Nill wasn't really a huge drinker.  The reason for that wasn't because she never wanted to drink, but because getting a hold of the stuff was slightly difficult, given that most of the games in the arcade only served non-alcoholic beverages.  Being a character from an all-ages game limited her exposure to more "adult" themes at home.  Nill was inexperienced with the whole bar scene, but that wasn't going to stop her.  Today had been particularly annoying for the grey-skinned woman.  She got called in early to fix a projector before a morning class started when she really just wanted to sleep.  Things only seemed to go downhill from there.  At least she managed to repair the projector with her limited knowledge.  Her next assignment had to do with a vending machine.  The dispenser of snacks was actually quite intimidating for someone barely over three feet tall.  Attempts to fix the neon box filled with Doritos went worse than planned.  To make a tedious story short, the vending machine apparently didn't take kindly to repeated smacks with a wrench and toppled over, nearly splattering the racer into the ground.  Nill only survived to be scolded later for knocking over the machine and leaving it there.

As much as she told herself she didn't care what anyone said, the truth was the repeated failures had affected her.  In the past, the only thing Nill needed to fix was her own kart and she was pretty good at that.  Nill felt significantly out of place in this school.  At least they could do was have her teach a defensive driving course or something.  Nill weighed her options of the potential hangover she'd get the following morning and she decided she'd risk it.  Maybe if she was bad enough at being tech support, they'd put her somewhere else.

Nill sat at the counter, her feet hanging over the edge of the bar stool.  Briefly, she addressed the bar tender.  When a shot of tequila slid her way, a smile almost worked its way onto her sickly face.  Nill was silently thankful for the presence of the pub.

[Deleted]

It was no Tapper's, but Ralph was willing to take this bar as opposed to no bar at all. The large wrecker had made his way inside and was presently trudging over to the bar with the hopes of just forgetting his janitorial troubles. Some kids had decided it would be funny to make a mess of things, and there were only three guesses required to figure out who had been called to fix it. Ralph truly was hating his job at this point. Fixing just wasn't something he was good at, and neither was cleaning, but it wasn't as if he could just turn down the job and go back home. Going back to his game would just result in the Nicelanders doing nothing but what they had been in the past. Frankly, he was sick of home and this new place. What was the point?

...Oh, right. He actually had been able to meet one person that made things seem a little worthwhile. Even if she had been bugging the snot out of him, at least Vanellope had been one student who didn't seem to mind his presence. Who knew? Maybe he was actually going to succeed in making some friends after all. ...And maybe pigs could fly. Who was Ralph trying to kid? Vanellope was just one student; it wasn't as if her presence was going to make the whole world look at him any differently.

As much as Ralph would have liked to keep thinking about it, when he got to the bar he spotted a game character he hadn't thought he'd run into again. While he didn't know her personally, Ralph recognized Nill based on her appearance. That was one of the supposed rivals of Turbo's, wasn't it? But... That was impossible! Hadn't she, Turbo, and the other blue-suit wearing racer been killed when the games got unplugged? Ralph seated himself and soon found he couldn't stop glancing Nill's way. He just had to know if she was who he thought she was.

"...Hey. This might sound weird, but... Aren't you from Turbo Time?"

[Nill]

Nill blinked quite suddenly as she lifted her face from the shot glass.  Yellow eyes flicked over to see the far end of the counter.  Nill regretted ever wishing she'd see someone else from the arcade around.  Was this to be her company now?  A bumbling bad-guy?  And to think once she was (almost) at the top.  The racer took hold of the shot glass.

"Now I know I need a drink," she snorted before sipping nearly half the glass empty.

Nill put her elbow on the counter and turned the bar stool a bit so she faced the wrecker.  With a grumpy look she swung an arm out, forcing a dramatic pose.

"Who were you expecting?  Pac Man?" Nill jeered before putting her arm back to her side, "Unless you know other racers with dead skin and unfortunate teeth, then I'd say you have your woman."

Even during the best of times, Nill wasn't the nicest character around.  But, around the particular circle of friends she was exposed to in Turbotime, bad-guy fear was quite common.  It sufficed to say she was still quite prejudiced.  And yet, she couldn't give up a chance to rant to someone who understood what she meant when she said "unplugged".  In fact...Ralph being present rose some interesting questions in her mind.  Nill just ended up here after her code was destroyed.  Did that mean Fix-it Felix Jr. was unplugged?  To her, it made sense.  History was bound to repeat itself, right?  Why on earth would Ralph just be away from his game unless he was, for lack of a better word, dead.  Hey, Nill  considered herself pretty much dead now anyway.  Turning her head away, she concentrated on her drink.

"So.  Is this where we go when we die?" she asked, suddenly sounding quite morbid, "How'd you get here?  Did Felix jump ship too?"

[Deleted]

Well, that certainly answered that. Ralph tried not to cringe at her words, but still didn't really succeed at hiding it. He cleared his throat after a moment, thus allowing Nill to ask her own question, and he shrugged.

"I was pretty alive the last time I checked. And yeah, Felix just kind of... Vanished. I dunno what happened to him, but I got this weird letter inviting me here after he disappeared. Turns out, they only wanted me as a janitor," Ralph explained. He wondered how quickly that would get a laugh out of her. Him being a janitor? With his huge hands and tendency to break just about anything, it was laughable to even imagine. Still, he couldn't really go back to Niceland. Not without Felix, at any rate. The Nicelanders would chew him out for ages if he came back without their precious hero.

"Gotta be honest, though. I didn't expect to see any of you guys from your game here. I mean, after what Turbo did everyone just assumed..."

He didn't need to finish. Nill probably knew what he was going to say, anyway, and his mind had drifted to a different thought. What if that meant that Turbo and the other racer were alive somewhere? Granted, he'd never been particularly close to either of them. The games they lived in had neighbored each other for ages, but Ralph had never gone out of his way to befriend anyone from there. That was probably because people just didn't like him... But who could blame them? He smelled funny, looked freakish, and was a bad guy. It was an awful combination. But still... The concept of Turbo, Nill, and the third racer being alive was mind boggling.

"So... What've they got you doing here?" he decided to ask. What could Nill's job have been? She'd been a racer before her game had been unplugged, so... Maybe the school had her doing something related to that?

[Nill]

Well, well.  It's good to hear that Nill wasn't the only one screwed over.  She had little time to relax before she actually had force herself not to loose her cool.  It actually took the racer a moment to comprehend the word "janitor".  The woman had limited success keeping her emotions in; though she managed to keep her mouth closed, a rather noisy snort came from nose.  Nill took another swig at her drink before staring toward the bad-guy incredulously.  Either the person hiring around here had a bad sense of humor or they were extremely stupid.  Nill favored the latter.  They did know he was called Wreck-it Ralph, right?  She never even hung around the characters of the neighboring game, and even she could guess what Ralph's special skill was.  Seriously?  Nill could hardly get over it.  She could even picture what kind of distastes Ralph was causing.  Amazing.

A comment slipped out before she had time to think about it, "Too bad Turbo vanished - I bet he would have loved that."

Apparently realizing what she said, she cleared her throat, trying to ignore that previous statement.  She wasn't apologizing for that - especially not to a bad-guy.  The question of what exactly her punishment was came up and ruined her half decent mood.  Didn't she come to the pub to forget about the day's stupidity?  Nill really didn't want anyone laughing at her failure.  Maybe she could be subtle about it.  Outright lying crossed her mind, but she knew she'd never be able keep up with it.

"Tech-support.  Supposedly, I have to fix electronics," Nill murmured, "I'm a little out of my element.  I take it they don't offer driving lessons at this school?"

Nill's gaze wondered, "Maybe if we're bad enough, we'll get fired.  Then we can all go home."

[Deleted]

"Yeah, he probably would've," Ralph agreed. He didn't pretend to know Turbo all that well, but Ralph was willing to bet that the white-clad racer, were he alive, would have gotten a real kick out of the wrecker trying to repair things. He couldn't even count the disasters he'd managed to cause in the process of trying to fix the problems around the school. His thoughts drifted away from that much, though, when Nill answered his question. She was tech-support. Well... At the very least, she wasn't breaking everything she touched.

"Heh... Maybe," he said in response to her suggestion of doing their jobs badly enough to be fired. He didn't necessarily want to go back to Niceland, though. The chewing out Gene would inevitably give him was enough to make ralph want to stay away from his home. Besides... Without Felix, it would be meaningless to go back.

"I'd have to hope that Felix somehow screws up badly enough to come back home, too. Assuming he's even here. That's a part of the reason I came here, actually. I thought maybe he'd be here... But I haven't seen him anywhere," he sighed. Wherever that little fixing man had gotten off to, he was good at hiding. Or maybe Ralph just wasn't all that observant. Either conclusion would have been possible, really. Maybe Nill would understand his predicament, though. He hoped that was the case. Otherwise, he was about to explain it for no real reason.

"The thing is, I don't know if I can really go back to the game without Felix. The Nicelanders love him, obviously, and if I go back without him... Ah, you know how it'll go, don't you? Gene'll chew me out and spit me into yesterday's newspaper. So I'm stuck here even if I do fail miserably at this janitor thing," he explained. He put one hand under his massive chin and glanced down at the bar for a moment. Some situation he was in...

"Assuming the game's even still plugged in. We could've been put out of order indefinitely or something."

[Nill]

As Nill was listening to the over-sized man's sticky situation, she was hit with the realization that she had been chatting up a bad-guy this whole time.  This certainly wasn't becoming for someone belonging to the most popular game in the arcade.  Maybe no one would notice.  Oh well.  It wasn't like Ralph gave her a reason to be dismissive of him.  Actually, she was quite surprised by how civil the wrecker was being.  Did she judge too soon?  So long as he didn't come too close to her, Nill would allow the conversation to continue.

A confused looked crossed her face, "Why would Felix be here?  This isn't my idea of a vacation.  So I guess I was wrong; everyone's being taken here whether they're dead or not."

Nill paused.  She lifted her hand and pushed back what would have been her hair if her head hadn't mostly been encased in a shiny blue shell.  As much as she loathed to admit it, she and Ralph seemed to be in the same boat.  Even if they managed to escape/be kicked out of the academy, they wouldn't have much to return to.  Even so, she personally would have preferred being homeless than being a monkey slave here.

"If Turbotime was unplugged, I'm pretty sure your old game wouldn't be spared," Nill huffed, "Not for a day.  They'll find something to replace you; something newer and shiner.  I wouldn't worry about the gamers missing you."

The removed her gaze from Ralph for a moment to request another shot of tequila from the bar tender.  Maybe if she had a shot glass in her hand, she'd look cooler while she was associating with Ralph.  A humorless, yellow smile curled up Nill's face.

"Maybe you'll get lucky and some of your friend'll still be around," Nill said, "Everyone I know and love is dead."

Nill didn't think she was being needlessly dark - as far as she knew, she was all alone now.

[Deleted]

"I dunno," he admitted. "It's just a hunch I had... Besides, I don't know where else I'd look for him."

Ralph hadn't even taken into account that he was conversing with her as casually as though no bad blood existed between good guys and bad guys. Technically speaking, Ralph didn't even know if Nill was good or bad. She was one of Turbo's rivals, wasn't she? So wouldn't that have made her bad? Hell if he knew. He wasn't about to question that much, though. As long as Nill didn't point it out verbally, he had no reason to dwell on it. Besides, he didn't really feel like moving any close to her. They didn't know each other well enough to sit close to one another, and regardless of that fact he didn't think she'd be all that comfortable with it if he'd attempted it. So, he stayed in his seat and listened as Nill continued to speak.

Talk about morbid. Not that he minded, though. Ralph really didn't care about what happened to the Nicelanders... Or did he? They had been rude and cruel to him, but did they deserve to suffer through their game getting unplugged? Ralph didn't rightly know. He shrugged once and adjusted his position in his seat.

"Don't got any friends, actually. Not back in my own game, anyway. You know... Being who I am and all makes it kind of difficult," he said.

[Nill]

Nill tapped a finger on the side of the shot glass.  As soon as Ralph mentioned his not having friends, she was tempted to scoff about how obvious that was.  But Nill managed to withhold her nastiness.  She didn't fancy her chances should she make the wrecker angry.  Of course, that might begin to change the drunker she became.  Not surprisingly, she managed to pass over the poor oaf's own feelings again and bring her thoughts back to herself.  And once more, she could relate - well, more or less.  Nill had two "friends" that were in her game - and that was it.

"Yeah, well, I ain't got very many friends myself," Nill said, "Just my brother and Turbo.  I don't - I didn't - leave my game much."

A sneer crawl across the racer rival's face.

"I never liked how the folks outside my game looked at me.  It was like they thought I was a bad-guy," Nill snarled, "I'm just another racer.  There's a difference."

She blinked and looked up toward Ralph again.

"Back at home, I bet the kind-landers or whatever didn't really like you smashing their house all the time, huh?" Nill said, "Around here, I bet I'm the only one who knows about that though.  If only you were teaching something - then maybe you could get some of the kids to like you.  Come to think about it, I wish they'd set me up to teach driving lessons - kids still like race-cars right?"

((I'm just working under the headcanon assumption at the other racer and her were related, don't mind me))

[Deleted]

"Don't remind me," Ralph groaned. He had gotten plenty of flack for what he job was back in his own game. Being reminded of just what Gene and the others thought about him and his job wasn't exactly making things any better for him. Then Nill had made the comment about him potentially being a teacher. That... Probably wouldn't have worked out that well, actually. Ralph wasn't a teacher by any means. He halfheartedly laughed at the idea and shook his head. Ralph prepared himself to say something about that very topic, but moments before he could Nill had said something about the kids potentially liking him.

...Kids liking him. How odd would that image have been? The closest he'd come to achieving that was his encounter with Vanellope, and she was only one kid. What difference was having her putting up with his existence going to have in the end? Ralph considered it, shifted his weight a bit as he thought, and decided that maybe it was worth mentioning.

"Actually... I did kind of have the chance to spend some time with one of the kids yesterday. It was kind of strange, but... She didn't seem to have a problem with me. Apart from the whole poking fun at me for every little thing about me," he said. Not that he expected to have a second run-in with Vanellope after that, though. He wouldn't have minded seeing her again, if only because he did kind of consider their present little thing they had going on to be okay, but still... She was probably busy with classes and all. The chances of him encountering her on her own again were slim to none. Hell, he'd probably see her hanging out with other kids and Vanellope would likely forget all about him by the end of the week. What was the point in dwelling on it? She wasn't going to want to be seen with him on a regular basis, right? Even if Vanellope had enjoyed his company, which he supposed she did, he didn't think she'd go out of her way to go looking for him.

"Anyway, I don't think I'd make a good teacher for anything. What would I teach, anyway? How to wreck things? I doubt that many kids would've wanted to take a class like that."

[Nill]

Nill's eyelids fell as she stared incredulously at the bad-guy.

"Seriously?  Children are probably the second most destructive thing I know," she scoffed, "Especially here where killing each-other is basically a requirement.  I think you're underestimating your usefulness.  For once, you're probably better off than me."

The female racer made another motion to push back her non-existent hair.  After tapping her fingers on the counter a for a moment, she appeared to think of something else to say.

"Congratulations on that, I guess," Nill said, barely able to hide the bitterness from her voice, "Meh, I never liked kids.  They're all little brats as far as I can see.  Still, they're better company than non-sentient computers.  I haven't really met anyone I can talk to here."

Nill's eyes became wider than usual.

"You better hope that friend of yours doesn't end up pit against a wolf or something."

[Deleted]

"I didn't think I liked 'em, either," Ralph admitted, "but this one's... Different. She's been through some rough stuff from what I gather."

Nill's last statement made Ralph's skin crawl. Although he doubted that the people in charge would be sadistic enough to put a small child up against a wolf, there was a possibility it could happen. Ralph didn't like that idea at all. Vanellope getting hurt just wasn't a pleasant idea to him now that he'd come to realize just how alike the two of them were. In spite of himself, he grimaced a little and shook his head.

"Guess we'll have to wait until the fights to find out what happens to her. I'd like to think that whoever is in charge here wouldn't make a little kid fight, but from what I heard of the last few fights... Yeesh. Maybe it's more likely she'd get picked than not," he said. The last part was mumbled under his breath. Maybe Nill would pick up on it and maybe she wouldn't. Either way, Ralph was beginning to have doubts about how safe Vanellope would actually be. At the very least, though, she had that one friend she'd mentioned. A dog, from what he remembered, was her companion. Just how safe Vanellope was with that dog remained to be seen.

[Nill]

Nill apparently hadn't caught what the wrecker murmured, or didn't care to acknowledge it.  She picked up her head again, staring blankly at one of the ceiling lights.

"Now I said I don't like no kids, but one thing I don't get is what exactly is going to gained by having them kill each-other," Nill wondered, "I mean, these...people brought us along too.  Why not have the adults duke it out instead?  Wouldn't that be more entertaining for whatever sadistic overlord is in charge?  I mean, I imagine most of us are more skilled in...whatever.  Besides, we'd be able to understand the consequences - most of us, I hope.  I'm just afraid one of these dumb kids is gonna take it too far before they even know what they're really doing.  Speaking from experience, in a way."

The little woman scowled and fidgeted in her chair before swinging her arm out in a clumsy, melodramatic fashion.

"And that's why I don't make friends anymore!" she added fiercely, "Who needs 'em anyway?"

Satisfied, Nill put her arm back down.  Slowly some sense came into her slightly-drunken mind and her expression softened.  Nill still managed to give off the impression of being cold, but now emotion started to trickle through.

"So...  What's your friend's back-story?  Rough times, huh?  She deserve it or not?" the rival racer wanted to know.